Determination

I will try to break my bad habit of never finishing anything this break. I want to do a lot of things, but I might end up not finishing what I started in the end. I know that I have a lot of half-read books, unfinished artworks, and a lot of plans left hanging. I just don't know why my interest on things steeply reclines when I start doing them. The excitement I feel every time I plan to do something suddenly vanishes after a few days of doing whatever that thing is.

I guess I'm just a kind of person who can't handle things in the long run. If I do need to do something that would occupy my time for a while, I would make milestones in order for me to keep track and stay working on whatever that is. And I guess I'm someone who easily gets distracted since I have a lot of interests. I always want to try something new, but the thing is, I never get to finish what I started.

Or maybe because I don't want to improve? Or I don't want to succeed in my field? I dislike success, in some pathetic way or another. I keep on telling myself that I always want to stay low, hidden from the scrupulous stares and echoing murmurs of people in the big, bad world.

Weird. Just weird.

Sometimes, I just can't understand myself. Maybe I should be determined to fully know who I am?