Friday, January 25, 2008

Dreams Abroad

I'm currently trying to divide my attention between listening to Felix and posting. I need to dump this out because I don't want to carry this thought all day long. Sorry Felix, I'll just do my best in the next long test for you.

I distinctly remember myself dreaming for me to go abroad in my junior year. I remember seeing the reflection of my eyes opening wide on the to the announcement board outside DISCS in the past. I remember imagining what my pictures would look like posted on that board. I remember myself imagining what would it be like to study abroad and live away from my family for a whole school semester. I was even choosing which country would I want to study for five months. I imagined what should I wear to fit in, if I would actually be able to fit into that very different way of living, what the people would be like, and if who would I be with when I study abroad.

Those were my dreams for the Junior Term Abroad the school was offering.

But there is something I cannot quite understand now.

Every time I pass by the same announcement board entitled "Junior Term Abroad" outside the DISCS department in the second floor of Faura Hall, I don't feel the same excitement as before. I cannot seem to grasp the concept of that program which made me want to go abroad and study there.

Everytime I pass by there, I see a reflection against the glass covering the happy faces of those happy students studying abroad. I see a vague reflection of a sad, empty person I am a stranger of.

Yesterday, Ma'am Jess gave us letters regarding JTA. I cannot comprehend why I did not take time to thoroughly read the single-paged memo. I distinctly remember that JTA was a dream of mine.

"Tatanungin ko si _______ kung papayag siyang sumama sakin. JTA kami sa Japan."

"Magdya-Japan kayo?"

It was then I realized something important.

It was then I realized that I have lost my dreams I have aspired for in the past. The dreams that made me face tomorrow with my head held high full of optimism and positivity has left me as well. Those dreams I gathered with all my might must have been blown away by the gentle wind that touched my face, along with all the memories I have placed closely beside my heart.

It was then I realized that the vague reflection I see every time I pass by the glass covering of the announcement board entitled "JTA" was myself. The glass protected the happy faces of those happy students abroad from my sadness.

It was then I realized that tears came running down on my cheeks.




Please carry my dreams towards the sky.

What dreams?




Makikinig na lang nga ako kay Felix.

EDIT: Okay, so nagkamali pala ako ng tanda. Wala palang glass casing yung board ng JTA. Napaghalo ko na siya dun sa announcement board ng DISCS. But...

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

game! JTA na tayo! XDD mahahanap mo uli yang mga dreams mo. Matulog ka lang. =P pero no joke.. mahahanap mo uli yan. :D

Anonymous said...

ni panaginip nga, wala na ako eh.

Anonymous said...

baka di mo lang maalala yun panaginip mo